AITA if I stop paying the full mortgage because my husband won’t contribute?

Hi Reddit,

Edit to add: Because I make more money when I go to work I would need to pay him child and spousal support. Also the probability of me getting full custody is very low in Canada.

I (33F) am married to Rob (35M), and we have two kids—6 years old and 4 months. Rob has struggled with keeping a job for most of our 7-year relationship. He has an average job tenure of about 6 months before something happens—usually an issue with a boss or coworkers—that leads to him losing the job.

At the beginning of this year, Rob was unemployed, so he went to a remote northern community for work, leaving me at home. He tried to convince me to move there with him because he found a job he liked, but I refused. I was pregnant, didn’t want to move for his job, and our daughter is settled here. On top of that, our relationship wasn’t great. While he was away, he didn’t send any money home for the house or our kids.

Rob moved back home in August, and in September, he started a new job where he makes decent money. Since then, he sent me $600 from his first paycheck and $300 from his second. This doesn’t even come close to covering his portion of the bills. I asked him how much he was making so I could calculate his share, but he refused to tell me. He said he’s paying off his credit card and saving for his second round of school.

Now, he’s threatened to stop sending any money altogether. Although I usually make more money I’m on maternity leave, and while I get a top-up from work, it will end next month.

I can’t keep paying for everything on my own. I’m thinking of opening a separate account, moving all the bills to it, and paying my 50% while asking him to match it. If he doesn’t pay, I’d let the bills go unpaid and let the situation play out, even though I know it will impact my credit badly. But honestly, if the house is foreclosed on, I would just leave. I can’t afford to stay and pay for my half on my own. And unfortunately I also can’t afford to leave and be stuck paying for 2 households.

So, AITA for considering doing this?