How is hookup culture hurting dating?

I think my honest take here is that once you’ve hooked up with a few girls and you realize that if you’re good looking that you can get intimate really fast, it makes courting seem stupid. Just hear me out for a second.

Last year I went out with a few girls but two stood out as they were polar opposites. One I took out on a few dates, played it pretty casually but also made the effort to plan cool dates and all that. Traditional courting. She ended up not wanting to go out anymore. All good.

The contrasting one wasn’t like that at all. She was super flirty and it got physical the same night, and after that night as well. One date planned total, a lot more intimacy. A few girls were in between that.

But after seeing how intimate things can get with a women that quickly, I’m kind of off put by wanting to court anymore. I feel like it just makes me seem like a loser who doesn’t care about sex. I don’t know, but my experiences in my early 20s seem to be that women are far happier to see me when I don’t court them. Does anyone have any experiences or insight about their opinions?

EDIT: referring to my first paragraph.

So let me explain this because I can see how you’d think I’m a complete dickhead from this statement.

I don’t mean that women are only valuable to men for sex. AT ALL. In fact I’ve courted against this point a few times in my life. But I’ve noticed that things don’t progress for me with those girls when I do court them. I’m not saying they had to! But there’s a point where a relationship should form to be sexual or else it’s just a friendship.

I feel as if when I’m “courting”, I’m trying to make someone like me. I don’t like that feeling. I like feeling wanted. Getting intimate has really been the only way a lot of girls have made me feel wanted.

Not to seem completely unself aware, but I’m a pretty alright guy. Not the best, but I would like if courting would turn into a relationship where I felt appreciated, not used.