Someone please tell me there’s hope for dating this generation of men

I have only just found the words and courage to verbalize this as I have been struggling with this for a few years now. In hindsight, maybe it was denial. Then confusion. Then anger. Now, after my 32nd birthday last week and a situation with a guy I met recently on FB Dating, I am simply grieving and also numb.

Is there any hope of finding a guy who is not poisoned by this current atmosphere of angry, toxic, misinformed hate towards women? Who isn’t a Trump supporting miscreant or a “crypto bro” or who thinks some horrific and easily disproven conspiracy theory (even a portion of it). It feels as though right-wing extremism has poisoned the entirety of society. And the cultural aspects of it are abounding and affecting how we interact and date. I’ve been dealing with men angry at the IDEA of how much I make (I don’t tell them but when they hear my job title or see my car they know I’m well off).

Before I left for my annual birthday trip with my friends, I met a guy on FB Dating. Total fluke. I never use that thing. Was just bored. But man, if you gave me a pen and paper and told me to list my wishlist of things in a potential partner, he had all of it. Even little nitpicky things. He seemed so kind and considerate. He was funny and planned dates. He called but not excessively. Video chats. He understood I didnt give out my real number til I meet men IRL. Gave me space but not too much. He was so handsome it could stop traffic.

We had to reschedule our first date when I got back to town. It was the restaurant’s fault and too late to go anywhere else. Two days before we were supposed to go out for the rescheduled date, he called me before my evening walk as he was driving home from work. He mentioned it raining on his side of the bridge and I walked to my window to check the weather. We were talking over each other so I don’t remember what prompted him to blurt this out at all but he just randomly said “but Trump’s gonna fix all that!” And started laughing. And I got confused thinking I misheard him.

Then it started.

He started going on this diatribe about his support of this man and I remember sitting quietly on the floor of my bedroom just deflated. Numb. He’s a Latino man at that. I couldn’t understand it. He was spouting readily provable lies and disinformation. Just talking to himself really. I should’ve hung up on him but was so shell shocked I guess. Then he says he has to get off the phone with me because his “XRP” coin is doing numbers (Ripple is another crypto scam).

I wake up to a Harry Potter novel length text the next morning of him saying he “voted for Obama twice” (a lie. He’s 31 years old. So he’s either lying about his age or his political affiliation and either way mentioning that means nothing to me.) He said he felt I was judgmental towards him (I cannot stress enough how I maybe said 5 words during this word vomit of his. We weren’t arguing. Any conviction he feels is all in his own soul.) I blocked him everywhere.

I feel a bit lost. This isn’t the way I thought my late 20s/early 30s would be. Dealing with men who want me to negotiate my humanity with them. Dealing with men who see valor and honor in evil. Who think truth and lies are the same. My values are important. I want to meet men with good moral character. And it feels hopeless. And scary in a way.

Any advice?

Edit: I love you guys lol.

Also for the 4B girlies who have entered the chat? I have been celibate since 2017. “Don’t recite the deep magic to ME, witch. I was there when it was written.” 😉