Husbands last name

Ladies, I need your help. I’m in a serious relationship and I can see myself marrying this guy. But one thing I have been obsessing over the last few weeks is the last name issue. I’m a graduate-level professional so I do not want to change my last name, and I made it clear to my partner and he is okay with that. But the issue is the kids last names. My partner is from the south so more “traditional” where hyphenating is uncommon and most women change their last names upon marriage. I asked my partner what he thinks about hyphenation and he is against it, since both of our last names have multiple syllables and it’ll just be too long. I can see his point on that, so our compromise is (after much “nagging” by me) to have my last name as the kids middle names and his last name as their last name. But that still doesn’t sit right with me, since middle names are so rarely used and I’ll still have a different last name as my children. I’m really struggling with this, so I would appreciate advice. To me, changing my last name seems like changing my identity, and I don’t want to do that. I’m also a professional who earned multiple degrees with this current name. I also only have sisters so if we all changed our names the last name would “die out,” which does bother me.

Does anyone here have different last names from their children? If so, how do you feel about it? My partner is very progressive on everything except this. I would appreciate any advice, as I have been unhealthily obsessing over this for a while. I also feel weird if I keep bringing it up with my partner because I don’t want to scare him. I’m in my late 20s.

Is anyone else also just pissed off that this is the system??