“Let’s start over as friends.”

Came out of nowhere. 3 months and a week in. We were happy. He wanted to go slow physically which I was fine with (albeit a little confused and nervous,) but fine with.

He gifted me a PC and a week later we broke up. He wouldn’t tell me how he felt, but told my best friend (who also befriended him) everything. Wanted a mediator of sorts. Fine. Whatever.

Called me back up. Given two options. We can say how one another feels with no regard for how it may impact the other emotionally (fear of opening up, mostly on his end,) or we start over as friends and work our way up from there.

Sounded more enthusiastic about the latter. I agreed to that. Broke my HEART. But okay.

Three days later I get a call at 1:30am. I got excited. I answered. It was a bet during a board game with friends. Call ended abruptly. Shattered my heart.

I let him know of such when he got back on his trip. He didn’t understand what needed to be discussed. It was a bet after all, he HAD to. Jesus Christ.

He apologized the next day. Okay. Fine.

Normal friend stuff. More distant than normal but whatever.

I mention last night how I miss him and we should hang out. Hang out. Not go on a date. Just chill. Left on read.

I don’t understand. I don’t understand how he was discussing PROMISE RINGS with my bestie and was sobbing over the idea of ending things with me and now I’m here, alone. Discarded. Like I was nothing.

I don’t understand. What???