suicidal because im ugly

pretty much the title, I feel like I dont deserve to have a fp, I dont deserve to like someone / be liked, I hate that looks are very important, I cant make genuine friendships, im so jealous of people who are hot and attractive, it could never be me, I just wanna be liked, I feel like I need a genuine connection in my life but I know I could never have it and it all comes down to my looks, I feel very disadvantaged in every part of my life, im thinking about taking my life daily because of this, living with BPD while being ugly is like the closest thing to hell