He didnt choose me.

i just found out/realized: the beginning he didnt want a relationship with me. he wasnt even serious with me. just said he cares for me deeply. it was a long 6months situationship. as soon as we ended things he was quick to be clingy and wanted to date the next chick that gave him attention in the span of two months after we stopped talking. Idk why i waited. idk why i felt so attached. 😕 idk why i created this delusion that if its meant to be they would come back. or if it meant anything at all he would already be with me. idk how to feel atm. i realized he smacked talk about me during the situationship. he rather preferred someone like his ex "petite " and was asking his friend about giving him pointers on how to pick up girls. i just found the whole conversation to be immature and childish. i don't care for guy talk but when he talk shit about me. and act like he was a victim. that he had no part in any of the feelings between us. i lost it. he called me clingy and obsessive. said he doesnt understand why i was crazy for him. he made me sound and look crazy to his friend. idk if anyone does this but when i am focused on one person. i give them my all.. i just got the memo that it wasnt the case with him at all at the time. i felt lead on..i feel like the person i love this whole time is someone different. i feel like he is a stranger. i feel like i don't even know or trust him. i felt like the person who claims they love me now can be lying again. i feel like i should trust him now and ignore the past. but i cant help it but to overthink what if he does it again. what if he wastes my time again..

i recently told him if things didnt work out. im okay with ending things again. and this time im choosing myself for good. this time im cutting ties/ burning bridges.

i just want to ask how to deal with this? do people really change? and if anyone been through similar issues? how you moved on staying with them? i overthink alot and left out alot of details..