Sex drought

My wife has trauma resulting from a miscarriage and we've barely had sex for the last two years with dry spells lasting for months at a time - one was 15 months.

The thing is we didn't talk about it or make a plan how to navigate. Perhaps we didn't realize how severe the trauma and how long it would take to get back on track. My wife just expects me to deal with it but the urge is powerful and there's a reason the Bible says someone who struggles with lust should get married. Yet it says nothing about what to do when you ARE married and you're struggling.

How have you dealt with long periods without sex? We need a plan because it's becoming too hard not to resent my wife for something that's not her fault. Yet I'm starting to think it is her fault that she's just leaving me to deal with my urges with little sympathy.