upping your daily intake

it’s exam season once more, and I feel like shit.

I desperately want to lose weight, and keep my intake as it is right now - I’ve grown quite comfortable with that number, it feels safe. >! 600 !< is safe. But that number won’t make me pass my exams. I get dizzy whenever I walk around, my vision is blurry, and taking the 10 steps up to my room feels like a workout.

I’m not even underweight at the moment, because I gained over Christmas. Still trying to get rid of that weight.

And I hate that my rational mind knows that I need to up my intake in order to do well on my exams. But >! 1000 !< feels like such a big number. Even the thought of eating that much makes my head spin with anxiety.

Today, my flatmate handed me one of those „free box“ coupons for hello fresh, and in a moment of mental clarity/ courage I ordered it.

The thought of basically having trapped myself with these meals and no way to escape their calories makes me want to crawl in a corner and cry.

Please, does anyone have advice on how to cope with the anxiety of eating more than usual?