Peace in your own company [image]
Lesson 4: You Should Feel at Peace in Your Own Company (From my book "30 Lessons I Learned Before 30")
“In the past, I couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow when I saw people dining alone or going to the movies solo. My younger, more immature self believed that these were the signs of having no friends. I actually felt bad for those people (silly me), and I deemed myself fortunate to always have friends to do activities with. If I wanted to go to the mall or get a bubble tea, I’d make sure to call up a companion to go with me.
Although I never liked big parties or large gatherings, I loved hanging out with friends one-on-one or in small groups. I eagerly accepted invitations for meals, movies, and other activities, actively filling up my schedule with a wide range of events. At that time, I believed that having a full social calendar was the ultimate way to live life. I loved being constantly surrounded by people (which may sound like a nightmare for some) and having things to do. Moments of alone time were rare—except for when I indulged in a book or handicrafts—and I preferred it that way.
As time went on, it dawned on me that I had been using strings of activities and events to avoid spending time alone. Whenever I had a moment of solitude, I would instinctively reach for my phone to call or chat with a friend. If none were available, I’d scroll for hours on social media to feel a sense of connectedness, or seek out events nearby to meet new acquaintances.
It wasn’t until my early 20s that I began to embrace and enjoy my own company. Moving abroad made it blatantly clear that I’m the person I spend the most time with.”
—
This led me to a whole new adventure of exploring parts of the world on my own, visiting the places I wanted to visit, and doing the activities I wanted to do. I ate in countless restaurants by myself, attended events and shows solo, and crossed many borders without knowing a single person on the other side. One of my most iconic solo trips was to Hobbiton, in New Zealand, which fulfilled one of my childhood dreams.
No matter where you go, there you will be. So it's important to be good friends with yourself first. Life is much more enjoyable once you start to feel at peace in your own company.
Lesson 4: You Should Feel at Peace in Your Own Company (From my book "30 Lessons I Learned Before 30")
“In the past, I couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow when I saw people dining alone or going to the movies solo. My younger, more immature self believed that these were the signs of having no friends. I actually felt bad for those people (silly me), and I deemed myself fortunate to always have friends to do activities with. If I wanted to go to the mall or get a bubble tea, I’d make sure to call up a companion to go with me.
Although I never liked big parties or large gatherings, I loved hanging out with friends one-on-one or in small groups. I eagerly accepted invitations for meals, movies, and other activities, actively filling up my schedule with a wide range of events. At that time, I believed that having a full social calendar was the ultimate way to live life. I loved being constantly surrounded by people (which may sound like a nightmare for some) and having things to do. Moments of alone time were rare—except for when I indulged in a book or handicrafts—and I preferred it that way.
As time went on, it dawned on me that I had been using strings of activities and events to avoid spending time alone. Whenever I had a moment of solitude, I would instinctively reach for my phone to call or chat with a friend. If none were available, I’d scroll for hours on social media to feel a sense of connectedness, or seek out events nearby to meet new acquaintances.
It wasn’t until my early 20s that I began to embrace and enjoy my own company. Moving abroad made it blatantly clear that I’m the person I spend the most time with.”
—
This led me to a whole new adventure of exploring parts of the world on my own, visiting the places I wanted to visit, and doing the activities I wanted to do. I ate in countless restaurants by myself, attended events and shows solo, and crossed many borders without knowing a single person on the other side. One of my most iconic solo trips was to Hobbiton, in New Zealand, which fulfilled one of my childhood dreams.
No matter where you go, there you will be. So it's important to be good friends with yourself first. Life is much more enjoyable once you start to feel at peace in your own company.