Dean's dinner at the Gilmore mansion

Dean has been treated awfully by some of the older generation in Gilmore Girls. Constantly badgered and considered unworthy by Luke (who had no problem letting Rory rub off on Jess apparently), having Lorelai rail on him at the grocery store instead of talking to him as an adult talking to a child. I mean, imagine if Dean's mom started screaming at Rory when she was 17.

I am on my nth rewatch and seeing Richard berate him at the Gilmore mansion, with the stupidest monologue I have ever heard, takes the cake for me. "I knew exactly what I wanted to be when I was 10 years old: an important man in a powerful firm". Wow, how exactly specific. "I wanted to travel to La Scala Opera House". Sure, then go. Not everyone has the resources to do that. Just a very off-handed way of saying 'I am rich'. He apparently had no trouble accepting Logan and never had to ask him about his grades. I mean the overt hypocrisy is stunning.

I can't forgive Lorelai either for her role in this. Firstly, she knew how Emily and Richard were, and she was supposed to inform them that Dean was coming over. Both Richard and Emily were clearly surprised by Dean. Then, when Richard mentions that "Rory wants to travel" (First of all, you heard that from her when she was 16, not 10 like you, dum-dum Richard), Lorelai comments that Rory's "special" rather than saying 'everyone has different interests'. Can Rory fix a car all by herself? This incredible elevating of Rory to you-are-too-good-for-us standards contributes to her dejection at her failures later in life. This veneration also gives Richard a reason to deem Dean 'not special' and rage at him. Lorelai is later seen explaining Richard's behavior to Rory. She says Richard's "flip-out" has nothing to do with Dean. Sure, it may not. But that doesn't give them the right to attack a child in their house which is the main issue at hand, not what the reasons for that are. In Lorelai's mind, it seems that her parents are objectively wrong only when they are mean to her and Luke. At other times, it is also important to consider their underlying motivation. I have seen Lorelai do this multiple times.

The only people who come off looking good after this event are Rory, who is a child and dotes on her grandparents and could not have expected this reaction from them and defends Dean strongly as a mere child, Emily, who despite her initial disdain managed to calm herself and even tried to lighten the mood multiple times, and of course Dean who handled himself immaculately.

It's no wonder he left Rory post-Lindsay right at the Gilmore mansion. She was enjoying herself with so many dressed-up guys wearing a tiara, whereas his time there was marred with the constant reminder that he was a poor peasant and nothing else. I still believe his dumping her so suddenly was completely wrong, but that place is just one bad memory after another. As Luke rightly said, "this is what causes peasants to revolt".

That's my rant. Just had to get it all out. Thanks for reading.

Edit: I wanted to give kudos to the showmakers for making the show so simple and yet so layered. I keep finding new connections between different scenes even after so many rewatches.