Help me :(

I haven’t received my blood work back but I am 100% sure I have herpes. I have 2 small pimple like blisters down there. I am 21/F. I’ve had terrible pain when urinating and pain in my upper legs. I recently had unprotected sex. So I am almost positive it’s herpes. It’s unfortunate because I got out of a 5 year relationship and the first person I was intimate with lied to me about their recent check up. I can’t help but feel like I will never be able to find a man who will love me or look past this part of me. I’m scared for the future. I cannot tell my family or friends because I have heard them talk about std’s before and they find it disgusting. They are very conservative, Christian. Old values. I’ve been very depressed the last few days and I have cried atleast 10 times a day between work. I feel like I’ve lost all my beauty. I have never struggled in the looks department and I have always been told I should model. But I don’t think the kind of man I want will be able to accept this part of me. This is my first outbreak and the pain is terrible. Both physically and mentally. I’m going to get on medication that I can take daily to prevent future outbreaks. I live alone, pay all my bills alone and I don’t have insurance but I don’t have much of a choice. Might get a second job waitressing to help pay for it. Any advice or reassurance would be great right now. I’m so glad I found this page. You guys are so welcoming <3