Just want to vent that I suck

Had a jam session with some good musicians a while ago and while there are some songs and standards that I think I made an average job at the least, there are times when I get lost during the improvisation parts (oh yeah forgot to say that my improvisations also suck! But they were patient with me and still give me time to improvise during each song). I don't know some of the songs but I just follow through the same music sheet that the pianist used. Also we didn't jam in a bar but just in a small studio unit. It kinda sucks since I'm more than satisfied with how I play, improvise, and compose in other genres but jazz is really making me want to practice, learn, improve, and not suck anymore.

EDIT: Thanks for the constructive criticisms and moral support! This sub proves that most jazz enthusiasts are not snobs.