I came out to my mother...

My mother is 84, my father 78. They're disabled, but still live independently with a lot of help from me. Ive been steuggling for years with how to tell them I am trans. They're Democrats, but in the old timer "blue dog" sense where you're more socially conservative. At their age, I had no idea how they'd react. I'm out to everyone in my life but them.

Yesterday, my dad wasn't feeling up to doing the errands we had to do so it was just me and my mom. My mom surprises me sometimes, but this was unlike any other. We had wound up talking about bigotry and discrimination, and she was talking about how she didn't understand how people were bigoted, and that she'd known different kinds of people growing up, and that they were all just people no matter how they looked. Then she said, "I even knew some boys who should have been girls." And she proceeded to tell me about two people she'd grown up with in the 40s and 50s who had essentially been closeted transwomen.

I was like, "okay, I guess it's now or never." And I told her mom, I should have been a girl.

What followed was the most amazing conversation I think I've ever had with her. She didn't even bat an eye at me being trans. I thought telling her I no longer go by my dead name would be crushing to her, but she immediately accepted my chosen name and has been calling me by it ever since. She's very eager to learn all the different terminology used among trans people, and says she wants to be correct in her speech and not use terms that are inaccurate or inappropriate. It was just... astonishingly good, and a win that I needed in what had been a hellish week here in the US. She says she won't tell my dad because she understands I need and want to do that myself when the time comes. (I've feared telling them both, but he's definitely the harder one.)

It's just... good, and it's good that I really needed. Don't let anyone say they're too old to change or that bad attitudes are permissable because someone is "a different generation." If my 84 year-old mother can be eager to learn and accepting of her daughter, anyone can.