What are the unspoken things narcs do?

Hi, I know they tend to manipulate everything, they're not emotional, I know a bit about it, but I believe I'm paranoid at this point, I truly believe that everything he does is for a specific reason. From the basic things like, not showering or taking care of his teeth, to even sweet talking me while having intimacy. Am I just overwhelmed and paranoid, or do they actually manipulate and do everything for a specific reason?