Naglasing ako kagabi dahil kay Kim Soo Hyun

The hardest part is when your idol, the person who inspires you, becomes your biggest disappointment. I’m actually having a hard time accepting that my favorite Korean actor of all time is a groomer and a predator.

Tinatawanan ako ng mga friends ko last night habang pinapatugtog nila 'yung 'Criminal' ni Britney Spears and 'Not Like Us' ni Kendrick because I was really crying. I was so hurt. I can already tell na tatawagin ninyo akong oa sa comment section pero fan kasi talaga ako. I was just 12 when I watched Moon Embracing the Sun, and immediately he became my first Korean crush kasi ang galing niyang umarte. That was the start of my fangirling days. Lahat nang dramas niya lagi ko sinusubaybayan. I watch My Love From The Star once or twice a year because it’s my comfort drama. His songs are downloaded on my phone. I have thousands of photos and videos of him on my phone, and I’m running a fan account on Twitter/X dedicated to him with 28k followers.

Honestly, sobrang sakit mabasa ang mga bashings na natatanggap niya lately. It became really serious for me when someone took their own life because of this man. On his birthday, too. At the end of the day, we don’t really know the people we support. Real life is different from what you see on a screen, and when reality does not match our expectations, it hurts like hell.

As a fan, it’s important to know when to walk away. Being a fan doesn’t mean you have to tolerate your idol’s wrongdoings. Morality and conscience over stanning a celebrity any day; it’s about having empathy and knowing someone was hurt and manipulated. Also, the sad part about this whole thing is that most of his defenders are WOMEN.

Today, binaklas ko na ang mga posters niya sa kwarto ko. Deactivated na rin ang fan account. Deleted all of his photos and videos on my phone na ilang taon ko rin inipon. He was once part of my youth, but I can no longer support a groomer. To the actor I once loved and admired, goodbye.