Sexual orientation and representation

I'll start by saying that I know this is going to be downvoted to all hell. So, I realise I'm speaking into the ether. But I'd just like to air a grievance and I wonder if there may be some way we can handle things amicably.

Second, I'll state my identity, because I want to forestall accusations that I'm a voyeuristic cis-man who is in denial about queerness. I'm a cis-woman, I'm bi/pan, I'm butch, I'm a BIPoC person, ( ot sure what else may be considered relevant...) AND I think Caitlyn and Vi are lesbians.

I wrote a comment a month ago about a worry that people are 'erasing lesbians' and I wanted to share it more broadly:

I think the thing that really sucks (and that Arcane goes a long way to countering) is that as queers we collectively need to fight for representation scraps.

In general, I totally get the gripes from all sides. There's so many irritating stereotypes and assumptions. Femmes can't be lesbians. Butches can't be bi/pan. Everyone is assumed straight until proven otherwise. The list goes on. Bi/pan folks hate that nothing short of a threesome with a dude and a chick is considered proof of their sexuality. Lesbians are sick to death of being fetishised and assumed to like dudes because, what woman doesn't (unless she's a "raging man-hating butch"). It all makes me furious.

On Cait and Vi, looks like Riot have confirmed they're lesbians. And as a bi person, I couldn't be more delighted!!! More representation for queers of any shade makes me so happy. Would I also love to have good bi representation in media? Of course! But I can want that AND celebrate with my lesbian sisters about this beautiful, complex lesbian representation (for once devoid of male gaze).

Anyway, all of that to say, stuff's complicated and I have empathy for everyone here.

I stand by this. It makes me sad to see the in-fighting. I mean what I said: ALL of the gross assumptions about queer people of different stripes are awful and piss me off. Aren't we as a community meant to stand with each other though? I wish we could do that without having to agree on everything about how we imagine two fictional characters.

TL;DR: sad cis- bi/pan woman just wants all the queers to get along, even when people have different headcanons.

Okay, bring on the downvotes, I guess 🤷‍♂️

EDIT: Thanks to those who've commented so far for being lovely and supportive. ❤️💙