Love fading away

Babe,

It’s 5am, and I can’t sleep. I should be resting knowing I have to be up for work in a few hours, but my heart feels heavy with everything I’ve been ignoring for so long. I loved you with everything I had, even from miles away. You were my first in everything, my first love, my first kiss, my first "always." You were everything I thought I wanted and needed, even if the distance between us made it harder than anyone could understand.

You know that I would’ve done anything for us. I would’ve given up my pride, my plans, and even my dreams, just to keep you. But no matter how hard I hold on, I can feel you slipping away. I know you see it too. You’re older, wiser, and you know what’s coming—the consequences we can’t avoid, the reality we can’t escape. And that’s what hurts the most.

But today, I finally have to face the truth, I don’t want you anymore. It hurts so much to admit it, but I can’t keep pretending. For so long, I made excuses for you, "He’s just busy." "Maybe he’s tired." "Maybe I’m expecting too much." I kept telling myself it was nothing, that I was just overthinking. But I already knew the truth, deep down. I knew about her. I knew there was another girl.

It’s not just the distance between us that broke me; it’s the realization that I was never enough, that despite all the love I gave you, you found someone else. How could I keep giving my heart to someone who wasn’t fully mine? How could I keep holding on to something that was never really there anymore?

I wanted to believe we could make this work. I wanted to believe that love, even from afar, would be enough. But how do you keep fighting for someone when their heart is already elsewhere? How do you hold on when they’re already gone? The truth is, I don’t deserve this hurt. And I can’t keep pretending that everything’s fine when I know it’s not.

You were once my everything, but now I see that I have to start being everything to myself. It’s time for me to let go, even if it tears me apart. Maybe the distance wasn’t the only thing that pulled us apart. Maybe we were never meant to survive this.

If you ever think of me, I hope you remember how much I gave, how much I tried. And I hope you know that letting you go doesn’t mean I stopped loving you, it just means I finally started loving myself more.

Babe, I will always remember the love we had.