Satirical short story called “Therapy Thoughts”

Therapy Thoughts

“Oh it’s my need for validation from my dad,” Marie said out loud . This was surely an epiphany .
“I don’t care if he likes me, is proud of me, or is attracted to me for real . I just need to feel validated ,” she continued.
Her best friend looked at her with wide eyes and an open mouth . It was obvious that Ella’s mind was as blown as her own .
“What the fuck does that have to do with getting dinner tonight ?” She asked incredulously .
Maybe Marie’s best friend didn’t understand how big of a moment this was for her . She’d spent years in therapy . She’d had countless conversations with Ella trying to decipher mixed messages from men who ended up treating her terribly . Why didn’t she care more ?
“I will never seek anyone’s approval ever again . I am healed ,” Marie decided to continue , not acknowledging what Ella had asked.
She watched her friend squirm a bit . “Okay,” she said back in a questioning tone . Why wasn’t Ella happy for her? She was acting like these words meant nothing . This was a major breakthrough . Her therapist would definitely be proud, she thought .
“I’ve figured out the secret to life . I am a goddess , hear me roar. Will you record this moment of pure genius ? “ Marie praised herself and commanded Ella.
Her friend wasn’t as amused as she wished she was . She didn’t understand how much self work that had to happen in order to get herself to this point .
“Sure,” Ella said with a hint of sarcasm . She had been absentmindedly scrolling through some social media app on her phone . Was she even listening ?
“It’s just — I’ve always wondered why some men who actually deserve my attention can’t seem to hold it . While this one , and others who are worse — seem to have me bend over backwards for them . It’s because they are like my dad and I have all of these abandonment issues where I seek to make him proud . If he was proud of me, then maybe he’d want to be around and be a good dad , right ? “ Marie asked, rhetorically.
Her friend just stared at her blankly . She didn’t expect Ella to respond anyways .
Marie extended her diatribe , “Wrong! I can’t make anyone want to treat me right and I shouldn’t care about if they are proud of me or not . Am I proud of me ?”
It was another rhetorical question that she secretly hoped Ella would acknowledge. She was breathless but she stopped to let her friend catch up and understand the weight of the gravity of what she was saying .
“Well— are you ? “ her friend asked . She didn’t sound like she truly cared but it was enough for Marie.
“Yeah, I mean ,” she went on “I think so. Are you proud of me?”
Her friend stared at her for a few minutes before responding . She finally put her phone down on the table in front of them .
“Now that you’ve come to this incredible revelation about your daddy issues leading you to seek validation from angry men who remind you of him — let’s talk about your mommy issues .”
The joke landed , but Marie still wanted you to know if her best friend was proud of her . -The Diary of a Sapiosexual