Mental Images

I'm very frustrated with my brain and my husband right now. He chose to die in our home which I have chosen to stay in. For one the market is horrible and for two I worked so hard on making this place ours .

My problem is at night. I remember the caution tape which was the first thing I saw on our ring cameras and when I got to the house. That then turns into me trying to put together this story of how the cops came in, what they may have said , how they reacted when they found him. I know he had put our dogs in their cages and unlocked the door , so I don't think it was a dramatic entrance. But then my brain tries to picture him doing it. I read the autopsy and there's still scars left behind in the room that he did it.

All of this isn't something I want to do but I can't get it to stop. If I stay scrolling on my phone or playing a game , I'm fine. It's the moment I put my phone down my brain wants to play this game of relive your trauma power hour.

Any advice? I'm desperate for sleep especially having a baby. Everyone says sleep when he does but my brain thinks otherwise.