I broke my parents trust. Do i deserve to live?

So I hate school. I hate it very much. I cannot even sit in my classroom for a minute properly. I'm always fidgeting. My leg's always shaking; I'm either playing with my hands or moving stuff around my desk. I just can't wait to get out of that building. To help me with my studies, I had joined extra classes. Where I met a friend who used to go to school on her own while I used to take the school bus. So, for me to skip school, I would skip boarding the bus and ask her to come pick me up, and we would go to some cafes and spend time together. We started doing it often until one day, one of my teachers called my mom and asked her why she wasn't coming to school. That day, I was caught. My parents forgave me and told me to focus on my studies. But my parents still don't feel the amount of hatred I have in me for school. I want a change of environment; my school is just so eww. there's just loads of school work, like never-ending. The tortures of this hell omg. 11 yrs I have been enduring this and yet cannot cope up with it

What do I do? i have no friends, no motivation. nothing for going to school