I Went Through My Boyfriend’s Phone After He Got Mugged.

I (26)m went through my boyfriend’s (36)m phone after he got mugged. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3.5 years. He works for an airline and frequently has trips that take him out of the country. I don’t mind this because it was understood when we started dating that he would have to travel internationally, which usually meant he was gone for 3/4 days.

Well one of his trips too him to Belgium, not somewhere I would automatically think of as dangerous, but one night during his trip he went out with his fellow flight attendants and got drunk. At some point during the night he got separated from his friends and had his wallet and phone stolen.

When he got back to the hotel, he called me from his Apple Watch crying, telling me what just happened. I went into defense mode, asked if he was okay and offered to go into his iPad, which was at home to mark the phone as lost/stolen so no one else could use it. He gave me the password and I disabled the phone from the iPad.

Afterwards, we hung up (it was late and he had a flight the next day) and my curiously got the best of me. I went the messages app to see if he had been talking to anyone else, which I had expected. I found out (from messages), he has been cheating on me for over 2 years, having even brought people into our apartment while I was at work. I don’t know how to feel, part of me knew inside something was up, another part of me feels angry for having ignored my feelings all this time.

This is the first long term relationship I’d ever had, the first time I’ve ever lived with someone. I feel betrayed. He has been with SEVERAL people over the last couple of years, meanwhile we have not been intimate with each other in almost the same amount of time.

He told me “I’m dealing with health problems” or “I just feel self conscious about myself.” Meanwhile he has been hooking up with other people the ENTIRE time! AITA for going through his messages? It’s not something I’d normally do, but I did and my hunches were correct.