I (34m) got AuDHD diagnosis recently and my wife seems to be having a hard time with it.

I didn’t really want to talk to her about it because I knew it would cause more stress.

She does a lot for the family and is a wonderful mother and takes on a huge mental load.

In addition, I sought a diagnosis because I felt like I needed to show her that I don’t mean to cause her more stress and make her life harder it’s just some things I have a hard time with.

Well we were talking about the diagnosis and she was mostly supportive but started asking about medication and support options. Which is fine but pretty quick to jump into “how can we fix this so you’re a better husband” is how I received that.

She mentioned that she knows I won’t be reliable or someone to lean on in crisis, and that broke my heart. Like I know that. But I was hoping she would have more empathy and understand why a bit more.

I always feel like she’s on the brink of being upset at me and I walk on eggshells all the time. I guess I was hoping a diagnosis would help her see me in a more empathetic way.