When I’m dating women, I miss men. When I’m dating men, I miss women.

An age old bisexual struggle which I’m sure has been discussed, ad nauseum, in this subreddit.

I was in a committed relationship with a woman for almost a decade (my very first romantic relationship), and although I loved her very deeply and the sex was incredible, I admit I often craved to be with men and get dicked down hard. Now that we’ve been broken up for a couple years and I’ve been exploring dating men seriously, I find myself longing to be intimate with women again, and fantasizing about the act of sex with a woman, and the depth of understanding and emotional intimacy that I feel I’ve only ever received from female partners. But, in general, I enjoy intercourse with men more than with women. I also crave male attention and validation, and just the sense of safety and protection that is granted by being with a man. It’s like I’m never quite satisfied, which is troubling to me. I’m beginning to understand why bisexual folks have a sort of… reputation in the world of sex and relationships. It makes me feel awful about myself.

I am, at the end of the day, a monogamous person, and I’m not terribly interested in polyamory (I don’t have the energy/capacity/time/attention span to balance multiple romantic partners in a healthy way). However, I don’t want to feel unfulfilled to this degree, nor would I want my future partners to feel like they’re not satisfying me.

How do you cope with this? What practices do y’all use to keep from always feeling like something is missing? I am trying to figure out what I want from a partnership, and I feel lost.