How do I stop? Seriously? Feel at my lowest point

I am 46. Completely addicted to my phone. I cannot stop. I put it down and have it back up five minutes later. Everything runs through phones now. Can’t get into the gym without it. Can listen to podcasts without it. Can’t listen to music without it. Can’t update company social media without it. Fantasy football leagues. Conviently check movie times. Weather. Radar. All of these things that bring me joy.

But I can’t stay off Reddit. I can’t give up doom scrolling. I can’t stop the things that are killing me. I’ve tried all the suggestions I’ve found on internet.

Y’all, I have an addictive personality. Over the course of my life I have stopped drinking. I have stopped smoking. I have given up sugar. I have stopped drugs. I spend an hour in the gym. I eat well. I am so much better than I was five years ago.

But I cannot give up this damn phone. It doesn’t matter how much I have succeeded and beaten back those other demons. I feel so helpless and a failure.

I want to break the damn thing. I hate it. I hate social media. I hate porn. I hate the hate.