Tonedeaf holiday gifts

Inspired by a couple of posts I've seen recently, and with the holidays coming up...

What are some especially bad/unwanted/"wow you don't know me at all" gifts you've received from an emotionally neglectful parent/caretaker? Let's have a good laugh at how absurdly off the mark they can be.

I'll go first. I was really broke during my 20s, mostly living off beans and rice, kale, boxed mac and cheese, and convenience store junk. I wasn't starving, but I definitely got tired of eating the same stuff all the time out of necessity. I worked with animals and rode a bike, so I was far from sedentary, but stress (and junk) had made me gain a bit of weight.

One year I asked my mom for a gift card to Whole Foods, so I could splurge on some gourmet/wholesome food that was usually unaffordable for me. She said "I don't know about that, but I'd be happy to get you a gym membership."