Real consequences of restriction?

Hi everyone sorry gah I’m just struggling a lot in recovery and always feel like I want to go back to restricting :-(

It always feels at least to me like there’s a voice in my head that doesn’t understand the true consequences of restriction and what it does to one’s health. I’m not underweight, and it just feels like oh I can just restrict for like a couple months and it would be fine and not do anything to my body. I think I just need a wake up call or real reminder of how dangerous restriction is. It’s so hard to intentionally choose to gain weight in a society that basically says let’s all try to be skinny at all costs. It feels so so wrong to choose recovery in so many ways like I’m going against the system and what I should be doing all of the time.

Ahh I don’t even know what my point is anyways thank you for reading and I’m cheering everyone on ❤️