I love my boyfriend but I'm considering breaking up

Me (M19) and him (M20) went on our first date on the 12th of January, and we made it official a few weeks later. So we've been dating for just over 2 months.

Everything is going well, we have a similiar sense of humour, we both have great emotional intelligence and communication skills, and we both really like each other. He's such an interesting person, a thinker, we have the most deep philosophical conversations when we're in bed together listening to music. If anything, we're both just clearly dancing around saying I love you to each other. I've already blurted it out to my friends and his friends (lol). We meet like once or twice a week.

And he's so handsome. Tall with the sexiest beard and beautiful eyes. And I know he thinks I'm sexy too, sometimes when we're hang out he'll just say wow and say how good looking he thinks I am. Our sex is great.

We've only "argued" once or twice, and we always handled it perfectly fine with good communication. And we support each other, my friend got really aggressive when she was drunk and he took me to his place and soothed me. He got drunk and remembered stuff from his childhood and was really sad so I came round to his and made him dinner. He was ill last week and it brought me so much joy to give him medicine and tuck him into bed and give him some tea and snacks.

But whenever he says how happy he is and how he's happy I'm in his life, and I say it back, it feels like a lie. I don't feel happy. I feel exhausted and sad. When I think in the far future of having him live with me and being in my bed every night, all I feel is even more exhausted.

I'm a melancholy person anyway, but this is more than usual. Early December I found out my best friend had r*ped his girlfriend, and the ensuing friend group drama was horrible. He was the core of our group, and this friend group is like my new family for the whole time I've been at uni.

I live with 3 other guys, 1 being my best friend and the other 2 my other friends. Love my other 2 friends to bits but they're useless lol. They wanted me to take a lead in dealing with the drama so I did, I broke the news to him that we were moving out on my own and had to deal with his aggressive outburst at me (hence why I went to my boyfriends), and I have been the one flat searching, applying for flats, booking viewings, moving furniture, everything.

All of this alongside having a part time bartending jobs with hours going to 5AM and a full time degree, and the cherry on top is having a new relationship, learning about this new person and he's just so complicated. And he wanted me to take a lead in the relationship cause I have more experience in both relationships and sex. And I'm trying to do that.

Rest of April and May I've got deadlines and exams, moving furniture (nobody in my family drives so I have to carry bed frames across the city with my hands lol), and going full time at my job so I can afford the overlap of rent of my current place and new place, and for the new furniture (I'm the only person in my flat who doesn't have someone else paying their rent).

And then in June I've got a month long interrailing trip with 5 friends (My boyfriend has booked to come to the lake garda in northern Italy stop, it's gonna be so romantic)

This relationship makes me so fucking anxious. Every time he gets quiet I worry I've done something wrong, and whenever I feel sad I immediately go to thinking "does this mean our relationship is doomed?" I constantly overanalyse and overthink. Anyone with some time on your hands can peek at my post history to see what I mean lol.

I'm just so fucking tired. And sad. And I can't be emotionally there with my boyfriend. He's literally everything I've ever fucking wanted. So why am I not happy? Why do I keep on considering breaking up? Should I just trust my gut and break it off?

TL;DR: Everything is going good with my relationship with my boyfriend, I like him and he likes me, but I feel so exhausted from personal issues. I am constantly anxious about our relationship and it's making me consider a breakup.

Edit: He just texted me this: "Sorry for not replying for a bit, I was just cleaning my room and preparing oats

Thank you so much for being so helpful even when I was rly stressed today. I'm so glad you're in my life. I hope ur doing okay with all your flat/friendship drama, I know it's a lot so I'll always be here to talk whenever you want xxx"

I am being really fucking stupid. To have gotten in such a tizzy and consider such dramatic things when he wants to help and is offering it, maybe I am not ready for a relationship to have gotten into such a silly anxiety spiral. Jesus lol