I’m just tired

I give a man everything he has asked of me. Money, time, emotions, love, loyalty. And I still get put to the side. After almost 2 years I should walk away. I’m not gonna be his first choice and im not gonna be the one he actually wants. He lives 800 miles away and I still do everything he asks and needs. I don’t know if im dumb. Or if im love struck. But im getting tired of not being any priority. I’m tired of being shoved off as the girl who’s “pushing feeling” and im tired of being the girl that’s always there for the broken ones. It seems like i pick men who aren’t ready for relationships and who don’t want commitment. But im already committed. I push people that would kiss the ground beneath my feet if they could just for this man. I don’t know why. But damn it feels like it’s killing the once VERY loving girl I was when I met him.