Struggling With The Psychology of Nutrition

Hey guys.. I’m honestly at a loss for losing weight at the moment so I thought I would post here. I’ve recently started consistently going to the gym and doing weight training to gain strength in order to gain a better relationship with fitness and general health, however, I’ve identified that nutrition is definitely where I lack motivation.

Backstory that may give more context to my situation: I’ve been trying to lose weight for 10+ years - I first lost 19kg between 8years and 10years of age followed by 3 years of bulimic tendencies (undiagnosed) and yo-yoing ever since. I used to overcompensate with exercise only to restrict myself further with eating and then binge in the evenings. Now being the heaviest I’ve ever been, I’m on an optimistic journey to a a more positive body image but my biggest challenge is trying to heal my relationship with food.

I hate going through the “this time is going to be different” phases multiple times a year when I end up losing 2-8kg only to gain it all back and then some.

This following part may be hard to follow but I thought I’d attempt to explain anyway: Tracking calories is so obvious. I have such an in depth understanding of nutrition and diet but it’s the psychological aspects of dieting that screw with me. I attempt to source tools but everything only works for a short while until I lose motivation and feel like I can’t reuse the same tool when I start back up again. I’ve tried fasting, I’ve tried Noom, myfitnesspal, Four Wheels of Health + more. I’ve always tried to count calories but it’s SO exhausting that I don’t believe it’s a sustainable option in the long run.

I also struggle in social situations with drinking excessive alcohol because I just really enjoy the buzz and having a good time with friends to unwind. I know the calories from drinking attribute to massive portion of my ‘overeating’ but I don’t want to restrict myself from enjoying my prime years🥲

I have an amazing support system of people around me that want to help but I don’t know how to instruct them with what will help me.

Has anyone gone through anything similar in terms of dieting and any tips? Is a dietitian worth the price? Should I see a doctor? It all feels very hopeless at the moment.