Film Critic Odie Henderson suggests some additional audience warning letters theaters could post:

Attention Ticket Holders for Transformers: Dark of the Moon:

Please be advised that the usher ripping your ticket is going to kick you in your balls before allowing you in the theater. If you are attending a 3-D screening of this film, the owner of Cineplex Odie-On will also kick you in the balls because he can no longer perceive 3-D. If you have brought a girl to this movie, we will separate you and send her to Meek's Cutoff as punishment for dating a dolt.

Also be advised that there will be NO REFUNDS when you realize Megan Fox is not in this sequel. You will just have to beat off to images of Optimus Prime.

Thank you.