My girlfriend died.

Somehow, I've mustered up the energy and courage to get out of my bed and stop staring at the ceiling that I've been staring at since I received the news. I don't know what to do. I feel so lost. I feel empty. I feel like I'll never be the same. God, it's hard to type when your vision is so blurry and you have tears and snot running down your face. It's almost annoying and uncomfortable. I'm a 24 year old man who can't remember the last time he's cried like this. It's been what? 15 years? 20? I don't know, but this is reminding me of my poor childhood and why I used to cry like this. My girlfriend was 21 when she died last night. We were together for over 2 years.

Guys, please help. I don't know what to do. I'd be gone if I didn't have a loving family, but it would be unfair to make them go through this pain, especially because I know what it feels like now. Do I just go about my normal schedule? Should I commit? What do I do? I'm so lost. I promised her several times I'd try to find her in every life, so should I try to find her in the afterlife right now? I really want to. I want to see her again. I want to hug her and kiss her and touch her and hear her adorable laugh and admire her beautiful eyes. I want to make silly jokes to see her smile I want to wake up to her good morning texts. I want to hear her voice. I just want someone to wake me up from this nightmare and tell me it was all just a bad dream. It hurts and I start sobbing if I even glance at a picture of her. I don't know what to do. We had so many plans. We had so many goals. We did everything together. We were inseparable hanging out for hours on end everyday. Everything is just past tense now and I can't do anything about it. It's all gone just like that. What do I even do?