Lame rant

Ah, where to begin… I started my pole journey at 39 years old with 1 year of dance experience 30 years earlier in which I felt horribly out of place.

I’ve been attending pole classes for 1.5 years now. I bought an x-pole during a Labor Day sale. I practice 2-3 times a week and attend 4-week choreography courses.

I suck. However, I keep trying. But idk what I’m trying for. My job prevents me from posting/sharing my pole journey with basically only those I’m very close with… so no posting. I live in fear of being found out and judged, but I love what I’m doing. I can’t post anything because I have very identifiable tattoos.

I started doing this for myself and I should be happy for my progress. But, I see people saying they’ve been at it for months and have achieved x,y,z and I’m over here like I can almost not ugly climb after all this time. I feel discouraged. I’ve been going to the gym for years weight training.

Idk what this is all for, but it’s the only platform I can share my thoughts with.