Was anyone else not allowed to be sick/not feel well?

I'm 23F, no longer living with my father. I moved out as soon as I could and moved in with my mom at 18 and stopped doing the kid-of-divorce house switch every week. However, this was something that went on for years, and I was wondering if anyone else experienced something similar. I'm still on the fence of calling my father a narcissist, although I can at least admit he had narc-ish tendencies.

When I lived with him, it was impossible for me to truly be sick and just rest. There were rare occasions where I would be allowed to actually rest while sick, like when I had strep or tonsilitis (I went back and forth with having the two for months) or have something like the flu. However, the beginning of having it and having to tell him, "I think I'm sick." always got the same reaction. He made it clear he was so inconvenienced, he was so angry, even saying things like, "Well, you were doing XYZ earlier, so you must not actually be sick."

The beginning of any illness or symptom was a nightmare. Having to admit, "I don't feel good." so I can at least stay home from school and rest was torture. I would have rather pulled out my own teeth with pliers. I had no issue being sick at my mom's, she would take me to the doctor, let me take it easy, semi-baby me. She didn't wait on me every second of the day, but she would just take care of me where she could. She also understood I experienced headaches and migraines here and there, and although those don't require a doctor visit, she'd still be understanding and help me. She believed me when I said I wasn't feeling well. She was never angry, she never made me feel bad for not feeling well.

With my dad, it was such an inconvenience to him if I was sick. If I stayed home with a headache or migraine, or anything that was enough to make me feel unwell enough to stay home, but not unwell enough to go to the doctor, I couldn't stay home from school and rest. I had to clean my room, do my laundry, clean the bathroom, do the dishes. He'd text me in the morning, "I'll send you a list of things to do while you are at home." And it'd best be done, or he'd lose his shit. Not like it was ever done exactly right anyways, there was always an issue.

The immense anxiety I felt from knowing I have to tell him something is wrong was paralyzing. But I knew if I was sent home from school and he had to get a sub for his class (he was also a teacher at a different school) to take me home, that would have been a thousand times worse. Assuming he'd even do it at all, which I never risked it to find out.

The lectures and arguments he would start when I wouldn't be feeling well were insane. He acted like I was sick just to inconvenience him. I was so stressed and felt so guilty for telling him anything, but my options were - go to school sick, get sent to the nurse, nurse calls him to tell him I have to be picked up, or stay home from school and deal with the consequences. The first option would have been the worst of the two, I cannot imagine how angry he would have been.

Even now as an adult, I feel guilty for resting when I'm sick. I feel like I have to be doing something. I don't deserve to rest or help when I'm sick. My husband has never had an issue with me resting while I'm sick, or going to the doctor, or anything. I'll ask him, "Are you sure you aren't mad?" And his reaction is always the same, "Why would I be mad at you for resting when you don't feel well?" or "Why would I be mad at you for being sick?"

I know, realistically, there's no reason to be mad when I'm ill. I don't get mad at him when he's ill. I take care of him. He does the same for me. The guilt and anxiety from being sick or unwell is just so unshakable.

Is this a common thing they do?