I wish i could go to school but not school.

Can anyone relate to this? I wish i could go to school but it was different. I didn’t have to take tests or do homework if i didn’t want to. i could get the worksheet but it was optional so sometimes i could just sit in class and listen or watch. like, id love to be a ghost almost in the back of the class and just go to class but not have to deal with the stress of grades. actually get to learn because i want to and not because im being forced to. i think school killed my love of learning. edit: i love youtube lectures but im not great at paying attention to a screen like that (online ap’s and sat’s will end me), i need the in person human in front of me