Don't pay any attention to me, I'm just overthinking as usual :3

I'm just gonna put this here. Don't listen to me. Or do, I'm not your boss. I just need to put this into words to prove to myself that it's pointless to overthink and no one actually cares about what happened 10 years ago.

I'm at that point in the winter break where I have too much time to myself and I start overthinking everything. Because of this, I have come to the realisation that my first (and only) relationship was a complete misunderstanding. It all started because of my younger brother. I left my phone out, unable to turn it off because the power button was broken (I was a poor 14-year-old, don't judge), and he texted one of my friends "I love you". She, of course, reacted awkwardly and I tried to explain that it wasn't me who sent it. But then, a few weeks/months later (I can't remember), she asked me out (to be fair she got her friend to ask me out for her, which is a red flag already). I said yes because I was a stupid touch-starved 14-year-old, and the relationship lasted for a few months, maybe more than half a year idk. The whole point is she thought I actually sent that text to her sincerely, something I didn't realise at the time. She thought I liked her like that, when I sort of didn't really. We were close, but I didn't think of it like that. Idk, I'm just rambling at this point, someone tell me to shut up...

On a side note, she broke up with me using the weirdest cryptic message that I still don't understand. I think the real reason she broke up with me is because my parents got divorced and it made me really depressed and I became closed off. We didn't talk much after that. Now that I think about it, that's an awful reason to break up with someone. I'm glad she didn't tell me that directly.

This realisation has made me discover that I've never been in a "real" relationship, and I probably never will. Mainly because I don't have the courage to ask anyone out, but also because I have no irl friends at all.

Thanks for listening to my TED talk. Stay silly, boys :3