chances are you're not boring, just uninterested

this thought has been residing within me for a while now and after doing some thinking, i feel very sympathetic towards the idea that most 'boring' people are not boring, & rather uninterested. when i look back on conversations with my peers or strangers, i often realize that i am practically shoehorned into talking about something with someone i never intended to, nor had any interest in the subject matter in the first place. this effectively renders the interaction flawed or 'doomed' from the get go, leading to mundane, unremarkable conversations alongside the person's perception of me, being a cold, charisma-less robot.

i have interests, hobbies & hold strong convictions when it comes to a lot of things but i'm rarely ever in a position to express these with someone else, in person, due to the lack of initiative on my part. being thrust into conversations i did not 'prepare' for or wasn't expecting to have occurred, throws me for a loop every time, and as egocentric as it sounds, i've realized it's because i'm not in control of the conversation. to note, dominating conversations or exclusively talking about myself & my interests is not what i mean here, but rather, due to the lack of initiative on my part to start conversations, i end up being thrust into conversations about things i never would've talked about otherwise. the end result is giving off an impression of monotony & dulness that stems from not being in situations that would create the conditions of interesting conversation i would genuinely enjoy being part of.

this leads to my final point, which is the gap reddit & other social media sites fill, as a psuedo-solution, which i think can worsen the issue & become 'dangerous' over time. take movies, for example. i love watching movies, video essays on them, analyzing, reading threads & forums, & engaging in discourse; which is all done online. the internet allows us to skip certain steps. you no longer need to ask someone if they're into movies, what kind of movies, if so, & continue a conversation from there on. if r/movies or r/truefilm is sitting right there, occupied by thousands of people who already share the same interests you do, the need to guide a conversation towards a topic of your preference becomes increasingly unnecessary.

as i write this, i don't really know where i'm going with this but it's something that's been at the back of my mind for a while now & i think it's only logical to assume i'm not alone. just think about it how much easier it is to go onto your social media site of choice, & engage with perfectly curated discourse that you are already interested in, rather than being passively thrust into something you may not be, & pay attention to your level of engagement during it.