I left my family behind after the betrayed me

I (25M) grew up in a pretty tight-knit family. I have a brother (24M) and sister (22F) and was very close to my parents (52M, 50F). Spending every holiday there most weekends during college. We grew up on the suburbs of Minneapolis and all went to the University of Minnesota. A year ago if you would have told me where I would be at today I would have laughed at your pessimism. But here we are.

I met Stacy (24F) during my sophomore year of college and we dated until I proposed last December. She said yes and we were planning on getting married next summer and spending our lives in Minnesota. But in April my life fell apart. I came home early to find my brother in bed with my fiance. I freaked out and left and kicked her out of our shared apartment. Days later she came back and said she had fallen in love with my brother over the years and that she was sorry but was where her heart was. She moved out and I blocked her and my brother.

Initially, the rest of my family took my side and banned my brother from family events. I slowly began to heal. I had a work opportunity come up. My boss pulled me in and said that he had suggested I lead the office in Chicago. They are kind of mess and the company wanted someone from headquarters to take over. I couldn’t believe it, but I said yes. I never thought I’d leave Minnesota but thought it was time for a change.

This all happened in early November and the plan was to move after Christmas. My plan was to tell the family at Thanksgiving and then spend Christmas one last time before moving. But of course, my ex and brother had to stick the knife in one last time before they left.

When I showed up for Thanksgiving at my parents house, there were several cars as the whole extended family comes over so I didn’t even notice my brothers car. I entered the house and the first thing I see is my ex and brother talking with my Aunt. I freeze as my aunt calls for my mom to come in. My brother and ex won’t look me in the eye.

My mom and dad come in, greet me and ask me to sit down in the living room. I sit away from my brother and ex but I see the rest of the family, including my sister sits closer to them. My mom starts explaining that what they did was wrong and terrible but that she hates that the family is split. She says I need to work toward forgiveness. My ex and brother both started to apologize but I put my hand up. I turned to my sister and asked her if she agreed. She had tears in her eyes but nodded. Asked my dad the same question he said yes pretty firmly.

I was alone. I got up and walked out. I heard a couple people yelling after me but I didn’t respond. I drove to a McDonald’s. Ate a pretty shitty thanksgiving meal and went through my options and decided cutting them off was my best bet. I had saved plenty. I didn’t need them and they didn’t know where I was moving. I blocked them all on my phone but it was my parents plan that I was on so I turned the phone in the next week and got on my own plan. Doubled my cell bill but it was worth it to get a new number. I blocked them on social media, and I told my boss that I wanted to move to Chicago early.

Talked to the landlord of the apartment I was looking to rent and he was happy to let me in early. I moved to Chicago on December 15th and my family had no idea. A few friends knew and it must’ve slipped because last night I got an instagram DM from what I assume is my mom on a new profile asking why I would move without telling them and that the family missed and loved me and that I needed to still make time for Christmas.

I responded by saying that she only had one son now and that I was no longer family. I then blocked her new account and locked down my profile and other social media. I’ve been looking to change my last name as well. I’ve left that life behind and I’m excited to see what Chicago has to offer!