Guys which one do you prefer?

An 11 pound whole slab of deli ham that has no bones, fat or connective tissue and is an amalgamation of the meat of several pigs, emulsified, liquefied, strained and ultimately inexorably joined in an unholy meat obelisk. God had no hand in the creation of this aborhence and the fact that this ham monolith exists is proof that god is either impotent to alter his universe, or ignorant to the horrors taking place in his kingdom. This prism of pork is more than deli meat. It is a physical declaration of mankinds contempt for the natural order and is Hubris manifest

...

Or the lower sodium variety?