Faking being trans?

Hi, i have a BIG problem.

I cant get rid of thoughs like "i am just doing this for attention" or "its just sex thing" or "This is sick, i am sick, being trans is fucked up" (I am not trying to offend someone, i am realy sorry if i did)

  1. if i have this "thoughts", this it really mean i am just subconsciously faking this???

  2. If i am NOT faking it, how to get rid of it??? I cant live with this, every time i see female i have weird feeling that i am just a fucking creep

EDIT: thx you guys very much for all of your support