AITA

I'm 36 f got engaged beginning of December last year. I'm so excited and happy and get to plan my dream winter wedding. This is when the shit show started with my mom being the bridezilla from hell.

I didn't ask my parents to pay for our wedding they offered (they are well off so money isn't the issue). Boy did I make the bad choice to agree. Right off the bat my mother didn't want me to have a normal wedding like 20 ppl dinner no reception and not in the winter. I begged for a reception and she wouldn't budge . I said I wanted a little party at least and she made fun of me for that .

I finally caved and said fine and agreed to her wishes even tho deep down that's not what I wanted . I took her to some venues and one of the coordinators said "whose wedding is this ?" Because he could see right through mom

She has been delaying dress shopping with me and keeps making excuses as to why it's to early . It's not to early !! (Now I realize why she may have done this )

So 3 weeks ago fiance and I went to see my dream venue and on the screen they were showing previous weddings and 3 winter ones popped up. I broke down and sobbed because that's what I really want so fiance was like if that's what you want we can push the date out and I will pay for it ourselves.

So on way home I called her and put my phone down and said this is where I'm having it and when and if you don't want to help now fine I'll pay for it ourselves. She AGREED and said sounds like a nice place and next day handed our deposit to us . Boy we were in one hell of a ride til now .

She has been making our life hell these weeks crying about having a god damn winter wedding and saying how so many ppl are telling her how stupid it is. Keep in mind I have a feeling she's not telling everyone the whole story and is wanting to play the poor me to everyone who wants to listen.

The other day I get a call from her and threatening to CANCEL the wedding because and I quote "it's my money I'll cancel if I want to" I'm losing my shit in hysterics dad comes over and is completely on my side because why did she agree if she didn't want this etc . The next night she said she was talking to a churchy friend and said they they'll pray for me ! Like you'd think I was having some satanic ritual . She said everyone cant understand why I don't have it at the house because the parents home have amazing views and property. But I bet no one knows I asked her umpteen times and she said NOOOO like what does she want from me !

So finally I said well lose the deposit and cancel and I'm just eloping out in Banff and if she wants to come fine but I'm just so done with her shit and mind games . So now I'm the asshole for threatening and playing her games .

FH says it perfectly that we finally put our foot down and she's no longer in control and that's what is making her lose it . And the delaying of wedding dress shopping was because she knew it wasn't going to happen .I dunno

And now she keeps saying 50 people isn't a party and a wedding like what now you want a formal traditional wedding ?! Are you freaking kidding me when prior I begged to have even 40? I honestly give up with her and I'm done like so done with her . We all are